Feelling better™                                                                                                                5/13/2024

Well it has been three days. Since I last posted.

I left the internet for reals. Minus Furi who I felt bad for whom I decided to respond back to.
Mainly because I kinda did not want to make someone think I was dead because that
would’ve been really bad.
Especially! On my part!

honestly feel a-lot mentally better now that I’m not terminally online and I don’t have a bunch of pocket people to talk to 24/7. I honestly feel like my interactions with people have gotten really toxic before I left. Like it was normal for people to yell at each other on the internet for basic conversations. Where tone indicators were not a thing and people thought we were legitimately yelling at each other instead of just having tech related conversations of which  we were mutually interested in. (Not me and Furi) Suddenly I don’t have the sudden stress of just always interacting with people online or like stepping on my tippy toes around people anymore on the internet. Now I can actually go outside, touch some grass, watch some things, and play games like Drakengard 3. No more worrying about what people think about me behind my back or just the eyes that were on me at all the time.

I’m free from all that now and I’m probably not going to go back to it. Suddenly it feels like I have the power to actually go out and explore the internet and experience media instead of just going back to the toxic cycle of always checking discord or telegram about what is going on in my favorite communities. Now I can actually enjoy things!

Honestly I don’t know what else to say. Maybe more people should just leave the internet and talk to themselves through insane ramblings on personal websites hosted via legitimately good free hosting.

I do feel more
isolated than ever though. Like I am forever alone now but I guess I just have to deal with that feeling now that I basically pushed everyone away from me. Maybe it’ll get better in the future, maybe it won’t! Honestly feels kinda dangerous now but whatever. I can deal with it. I mean at this rate I kinda have to consider I probably won’t get welcomed back to the places where I left anyway because of how the modern internet works.

Anyway, have this card of me goodbye!